People of Ireland!
Don't for one moment imagine your puny voice will carry against the might of the Empire. But through your impudence and ingratitude, you have chosen the path of destruction.
So be it. The Imperial Restitution Council is now in session, and the Giant Beam of Fiscal Doom has been calibrated.
Your one remaining chance of life is to prostrate yourselves in obeisance at the feet of His Most High Excellency José Manuel Barroso. Confess the error of your ways. Work with him to find salvation. Have faith in those who know what's good for you.
Or perish in the fires of budgetary damnation.
Thank God for Ireland. In rejecting the Lisbon superstate stitch-up they have spoken for all the hundreds of millions who were given no voice. And just so we're clear, relative to its GDP, Ireland has been by far the biggest beneficiary of EU hand-outs since it joined alongside us in 1973:
So if the Irish don't like the way the EU's heading, how much worse should we feel?