Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Cliff-Edge Mole Man In Metaphor Meltdown

Do you want to be ruled by him? Well, do you?

Writing a blog, Tyler finds himself looking around for arresting metaphors. On the morning of Brown's crisis breakfast meeting with the bankers (see here), the papers are stuffed full of them.

At Cayton Bay, near Scarborough, homes are being demolished after their gardens disappeared over the cliff in a land slip. Yes, not bad... the entire housing market is certainly going over a cliff, with prices falling at the fastest rate since records began:

But then again, the Mole Man of East London has just been stopped after 40 years of burrowing hobby tunnels from under his house and imperilling Hackney. Yes... Brown has certainly undermined our wellbeing with his high tax, high borrowing, high incompetence Stalinism: but absent his wibbly spineless colleagues mounting a coup, how can he be stopped?

What about Lady Mucca's wonky cleavage getting booed at a beauty pageant? Brown's wonky grip on reality, yes... umm... well how about the cleavage in his party support... hmm...

The reality is that events are fast becoming more surreal than any twisted metaphor Tyler can come up with. We've just had a phone call from an estate agent asking if we're still interested in moving. Given that we went onto his books about 6 years ago and haven't looked at anything with him since, it was something of a long-shot. But with 4,000 of them heading for the shredder this year, I guess anything's worth a try.

And then there's Mr TT on the Today programme: I still can't get used to the idea that they actually have an interviewer who asks sensible informed questions about things like the credit crunch. This morning he grilled the self-serving head of the Council of Mortgage Lenders (see this blog), pointing out that his hand-wringing plea for taxpayer assistance to hard-pressed mortgagees was actually just another way of bailing out the banks. Excellent stuff.

But there's one reality we have to hold onto. We must not allow Brown and Darling to bail out the banks with our money. Whatever flim-flam they come up with, the losses and the risks must stay with the banks and their shareholders. The money must stay with us taxpayers.

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