Following last week's post on National Chip Week, our Sustainable Inclusion Strategy Group has been working on preliminary consultation plans for the Britain's Most Useless Quango Awards. And in conformity with the revised EU Nomenclature Directive (EC06/234/4788i), the awards will henceforth be known as the BUMQAs.
The BUMQAs will be for the many not the few. Open to all publicly funded non-governmental bodies- entirely irrespective of size or logo design- the only requirement is that all entrants should be truly, deeply, irretrievably useless. And in the interests of fairness- fairness for all- even those very many quangos causing positive harm to their "clients" will be considered. (Although we should point out that a perceptible act of causing harm may itself indicate a degree of activity incommensurate with the looked-for state of ineffectual uselessness.)
The aim of the BUMQAs is simple: to recognise and salute Excellence. We will find Britain's Beacon Quangos, so that overperforming quangos may learn from them.
We are currently in discussion with the Big Lottery Fund and other public sector partners to provide sponsorship for these prestigious awards. Meanwhile, we will be reviewing some of the early contenders, starting with selections from the nine nominations in Dan Lewis's excellent Essential Guide To British Quangos:
- British Potato Council (responsible for Chip Week)
- Milk Development Council
- Energy Saving Trust
- Agricultural Wages Committees
- Wine Standards Board
- Westminster Foundation For Democracy
- Football Licensing Authority
- Investors in People
- Economic & Social Research Council
If anyone wishes to add to this initial list, please do so. Our Participation Outreach Advisory Panel will consider all nominations in due course.